[Ansteorra] on leaving the SCA--

Tue Feb 5 17:29:26 PST 2013

Thank you, Old Friend.

Ismet

On 2/5/2013 7:00 PM, Ld.blackmoon wrote:
> greetings
>
> ok, having read all these posts , I believe that there is an ongoing 
> communication issue .
> as has been pointed out in the past , this is the modern internet, not 
> face to face communication .
> a lot of things , don't translate to this electronic media well. such 
> as tonal inflection, facial expressions, body language, etc.
>
> while lady ismet used the " soup Nazi " term as an example , to 
> illustrate her point, she did not say she wanted to run around calling 
> her friends Nazi's.
> back before pc patrol members and even email lists were around , I had 
> a friend who's security guard uniform made him look like a Nazi 
> officer. when ever people would call him a Nazi , he would snap to 
> attention , slap his heels together , do the stiff arm salute, and 
> say  " BIG SMILE " to which people would either crack up laughing , or 
> walk away disgusted , but they stopped attacking him verbally...
> he was in no way saying the Nazi's were something to look up to, but 
> was in fact trying to improve a bad situation.
>
> in turn , your posts lady astridr , when read can come across as 
> verbal attacks ,( even though you probably didn't intend that at all, 
> emotion can hinder online communication ( in both directions ) in many 
> ways ) because someone mentioned a word you loath .
> even the way you speak of the  " period Nazi " in your last post comes 
> across as an attack.
>
> " Because that's what is going on when you call someone a "period 
> Nazi", you're trying to make them feel bad about the thing that brings 
> them joy."
>
> I don't think you were trying to say that its not ok to call someone a 
> period Nazi when they are pouncing on nubies, ( or even old time 
> members ) ,talking down to those they have chosen to attack , because 
> those people are enjoying attacking and belittling someone that 
> probably doesn't know that everyone isn't going to treat them like 
> that , and by calling them a Nazi, they might have " their " feelings 
> hurt .
> (which makes it sound like its not ok to call a bully a name because 
> it might hurt their feelings. )
> but that's how it can read .besides would calling them American 
> cavalry be any better ?? how many thousands of women and children did 
> they kill to make way for more white settlers ? and there are many 
> other groups and governments that have acted just as badly.
>
>
> in the old days ( early 80's ) it didn't matter that in the real world 
> we were losers, geeks, dreamers,etc. because when we went to an event 
> , or a revel, or a practice , we weren't Joe geek, Moe loser,  or 
> Denise dreamer , we were " lord " or " lady " somebody , from 
> someplace far off , and we were honorable, and chivalrous , and we 
> tried to act accordingly in our home made t-tunic and jeans , and our 
> carpet armor with Freon can helm and shopping cart face grills.
> we bowed to the ladies, we bowed to anyone with a crown ( ok so some 
> of them were undoubtedly coronets , but to us they were crowns, and 
> thus to be respected. )
> but many times it seems that as we have tried to become more " period" 
> we may have become in some ways " TOO PERIOD " we now have all the 
> back stabbing ,political maneuvering , and caste systems of much of 
> the middle ages ... the only things missing are the hereditary royals, 
> and poisoning the nobles , so some other " noble " could take his 
> place : (  , at least the " knights " aren't " taking their pleasure " 
> with every milk maid they come across , or robbing the peasants  ( 
> thank you good sir knights   : )
>
> we used to go to events to relax , and enter a fantasy world , brought 
> to life by everyone there ,( anyone remember wolfstar blowing horns 
> all night on one end of the site, and rolling thunder playing drums 
> all night on the other end of site ?? , or how about wandering from 
> camp to camp listening to many different bards sing songs, or tell 
> tales by the camp fire ?? or even watching the children ( and some 
> adults, if I recall namron or was it weisenfeuer ? had a very potent 
> maypole =) dancing the may pole  ?? ) but now dancing the maypole is 
> considered npc ( not politically correct ) since it is a " fertility " 
> dance and anyone under 21 shouldn't be near it, because we could be 
> held liable and sued ) , now it seems that we go to events, to climb 
> some ladder, or work, or complain that someone else isn't playing the 
> way we like... but you don't hear people talking about how much fun 
> some event was , you hear about somebody suing , or some lawsuit, or 
> ways to avoid the possibility of either.  so we seem to have traded in 
> fun for fear : (
>
> anyway , I hope I haven't added to the confusion, and communication 
> problems, or offended anyone.
> this is after all just my opinion , which is just as common ( or 
> valuable ) as anyone else's, and I hope that it does provoke thought 
> without provoking anger : )
>
> Be Safe , Be Happy, Have Fun .
> Arthur
>
> ----- Original Message ----- From: "Bree Flowers" <evethejust at gmail.com>
> To: "Kingdom of Ansteorra - SCA, Inc." <ansteorra at lists.ansteorra.org>
> Sent: Tuesday, February 05, 2013 5:35 PM
> Subject: Re: [Ansteorra] on leaving the SCA--
>
>
>> Okay, clearly I am being misunderstood. I really don't get it. I don't
>> understand how one person saying "I should be freely able to apply
>> this horrible moniker to my friends" and someone else saying "because
>> it's both out-of-period and hurtful" is a bad thing. I didn't say that
>> anything else in their message was wrong. Feel free to embrace the
>> rest of it and enjoy.
>>
>> When someone says "not being allowed to use this hurtful term in jest
>> is spoiling my fun", I'm put in mind of the popular kids in school who
>> would have said that calling many of us "geeks and losers" (and worse
>> things I'm sure) was just them having fun. If what you are doing is
>> hurtful to someone else, and if fun can be had without it, then I
>> don't get why anyone would defend it as "okay". It's not "political
>> correctness" to say that the term is inappropriate. If you want to
>> compare it to any modern movement it's more like anti-bullying.
>> Because that's what is going on when you call someone a "period nazi",
>> you're trying to make them feel bad about the thing that brings them
>> joy.
>>
>> We don't call our friends whores, despots or murderers, so why do we
>> call any of them nazis? I mean unless they actually were members of
>> that political movement and participated in the mass genocides, in
>> which case have at it.
>>
>> ~Astridr
>>
>> On Tue, Feb 5, 2013 at 5:12 PM, Sir Chiang <chiang at clearwire.net> wrote:
>>> I would say that sounds a bit harsh, and overly sarcastic. Maybe it 
>>> was not
>>> meant that way but it sure reads like that.
>>>  I know that stuff like what you have written has made me question 
>>> why I put
>>> so much into this game. I too mourn the lose of so many people that 
>>> I looked
>>> up to and set the examples for me to follow.
>>>  Lately I have been asking myself why I keep at it, best answer I 
>>> can give
>>> myself is that I have put too much investment in it and made some 
>>> promises
>>> that have yet to be fulfilled. When are accomplished, I will probably
>>> rethink a lot too.
>>> Your humble servant,
>>> Sir Chiang
>>>
>>> ----- Original Message ----- From: "Bree Flowers" 
>>> <evethejust at gmail.com>
>>>
>>> To: "Kingdom of Ansteorra - SCA, Inc." <ansteorra at lists.ansteorra.org>
>>> Sent: Tuesday, February 05, 2013 5:00 PM
>>>
>>> Subject: Re: [Ansteorra] on leaving the SCA--
>>>
>>>
>>>> Wow, really? Someone saying their feelings were hurt and that the
>>>> dream was tarnished was inspirational but someone else suggesting that
>>>> we treat our friends with respect and kindness and that being "period"
>>>> isn't a daunting task, and doesn't require hours of research but
>>>> simply a little bit of effort in the moment saps your will to
>>>> participate? Interesting.
>>>>
>>>> ~Astridr
>>>
>>>
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>
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