[Bards] I fixed it.

Floyd Brigdon brigdon at tvcc.edu
Tue Jan 13 13:27:53 PST 2004


    Even better.
    Excellent, milord.

    Milo
  ----- Original Message ----- 
  From: ED Reese 
  To: Ansteorran Bardic list 
  Sent: Tuesday, January 13, 2004 3:25 PM
  Subject: [Bards] I fixed it.


  Try this. It's better. 5-4-5 rhyme scheme in the Florentine style. Inspired by HRM Miguel at his Coronation.

  © 2004

  ED Reese

   

  Call to Estrella
   

  Red arrow flying!

  Black Star Rising

  over Blood Red Sun.

   

  Glory to be won!

  Deeds to be done

  on the fields of dread.

   

  Falcon will be fed!

  War lies ahead

  for the Black Star's foe.

   

  Dealing the death blow!

  Foeman will know

  King's swift sword striking!

   

  Lancers are charging!

  Hard hooves drumming;

  to iron-shod attack!

   

  Foemen reeling back!

  Bows sing, axes hack

  brave souls are dying.

   

  Falcon is flying!

  Black Star rising

  over Blood Red Sun.



  FYI, Blood Red Sun starts in caps for the same reason Falcon and Black Star are.



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