[Bards] Just looking for some feed back

[R. Culver]

Wihtric hláfard Wihtmunding greets the wordsmiths of Ansteorra!


Not sure I have made an introduction here, but I was briefly on the FB
page.  I have since forsaken all social media, so I have few format for
feedback.

Anyway, I am Wihtric from Steppes.  About all I am even remotely known for
is a knack with Germanic languages I translation, a very narrow skill
indeed.  I have rendered things like Dr. Seuss into Old English and am now
starting my second original piece, at least for SCA consumption, in Old
English. My first is a small hymn to Harold Godwineson that some may have
seen at various places on the anniversary of Hastings.

This new selection I am pondering is for the "For the Love of My Kingdom"
bardic on Wednesday at Gulf Wars.  A few notes I have never perform at a
bardic at all, so it would be my first time.  Two, I am not sure how this
would go over.  Should I keep it as is, working with someone willing to
read the translation as I speak in Old English, or should I Just toss the
Old, wite in new but similar format, and keep the Old for an A&S display
perhaps later, or LPT?

This is only the first few lines.  I tend to think in Old and New English
simultaneously, as weird as that is. Also note that when I translate to try
to keep to keep to the words and order as is best able, thus it can come
off as like Yoda.  I do this intentional as I have educational reasons for
that.

Anyway, here goes nothing.

Eala, bearnas mancynnes, æðelu and gesiþas!
LO, bairns of mankinds, nobility and companions!

Fram fægere land, feor and neah,
>From fair lands, far and near,

cumaþ hildáca in hæleþa-gamenum tógædere,
come battle-oaks in warrior-games together,

wuldor mid benc-winum to winnanne.
Glories with bench-friends to win.

Ac ne land nis tó heofonum neara
But no land is to the heavens nearer

swa cynehám ure mid steorran blæcum.
as our royal-home with a star black.

Again tis is just a starting point.  I didn't want to get too far into it
if advice was going to be contrary to my plans. I have one skill in this
game, and I am just trying to showcase it as much as I can.

Gódspéde!

Wihtric