[Bordermarch] Consummately Acceptable

[David Lathrop]

Greetings Bordermarch,
 
Last weekend, the Stargate/Loch event saw our good friend HE Ihon, Baron of Stargate, approach our new pavillion and comment on its appearence.
The following is a true account of Lord Adolf the Bear and my thoughts and conversations when Baron Ihon looked at the center pole of the pavilion and said,
"It's Consummately Acceptable."




 
 Consummately Acceptable
 
Understand this my friends and pray thee take heed,
for the Bear needs no cause to bristle his pelt and knot 
his large brow, 
I say to thee, "Beware! for lone war tooth's bite shall render!
 
 
 
 
  “Master!” he whispers, his haunches now tight,
for the Bear has heard words setting him not quite right.
“Me thinks this means WAR!” grunts the Bear in hushed tones,
caring not that his spittle has splattered my throne.
Molten and flat, shattered yolks on hot iron,
his two eye’s now tearless, inside the Bear's crying.
“I am angered Master!,  I don’t understand
those big words spewing forth from the lips on that man.”
“Consummately Acceptable?” said I to the Bear,
“Yes Master! Yeeees Master! you say them with ease,
but you know my tongue’s fat, I think you do tease.”
“Your tongue is quite fat and chokes you at times,
but gagging on big words grants none rights to whine."
"Now practice the mantra I taught you at war,
say NEE then NEE only twice and no more!”
“I’ll NOT! say my mantra till I understand
why the Baron of Stargate has schemed such a plan.”
While the Bear blathered on with his raves and his rants,
I gathered my thoughts and started my dance.
I’d dance with those words and tear them apart,
and thus find the light or the dark in a heart!
“Consummately Acceptable” was it poetry or prose?
                The phrase seemed complex with a nutty like nose.
To invert the words first then extrapolate last
yields, “Exceptional Consumption”, is he calling us crass?
Does he think us stupid, inane, or absurd,?
Is he trying to hurt us with really big words?
Wars had been fought over far lesser things
So I quit with the dance and the sorrow it’d bring
I bid Baron Ihon a cautious goodbye 
then turned to the Bear to find watering eyes.
“I could truncate his legs with my big gnarly tooth,
or hobble his feet and steal his fine boots!”
Said the Bear through his tears and his quivering lips
“I wanted a war and now we get ZIP!”
 
 
HE Santiago