[Loch-Ruadh] My First Speech if I were elected President.

[ykt ktykt]

Minimum wage for politicians!


> [Original Message]
> From: Terry Varner <tdv250 at hotmail.com>
> To: <loch-ruadh at ansteorra.org>
> Date: 05/27/2004 4:12:36 PM
> Subject: [Loch-Ruadh] My First Speech if I were elected President.
>
> My fellow Americans:
>
> As you all know, the defeat of Iraq's regime has been
> completed.
>
> Since congress does not want to spend any more money
> on this war, our mission in Iraq is complete.
>
> This morning I gave the order for a complete removal
> of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be
> complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the
> reckoning.
>
> Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the
> names of countries which have stood by our side during
> the Iraq conflict. This list is short: The United
> Kingdom, Bulgaria, Australia, Norway and Poland
> are some of the countries listed there.
>
> The other list contains everyone not on the first
> list. Most of the world's nations are on that list.
>
> My press secretary will be distributing copies of both
> lists later this evening.
>
> Let me start by saying that effective immediately,
> foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases
> immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during
> the first year alone will pretty much pay for the
> costs of the Iraqi war.
>
> The American people are no longer going to pour money
> into third world hell- holes and watch those
> government leaders grow fat on corruption.
>
> Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic?
> Call France.
>
> In the future, together with Congress, I will work to
> cut taxes and solve some local problems.
>
> On that note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw
> with us and we will hunt you down and eliminate you
> and all your friends from the face of the earth.
>
> Thirsting for a gutsy country to terrorize? Try
> France, or maybe China.
>
> To Israel and the Palestinian Authority. You, boys.
> Work out a peace deal now. Just note that Camp David
> is closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for
> negotiations. They have some great palaces there. Big
> tables, too.
>
> I'm ordering the immediate severing of diplomatic
> relations with France, Germany, and Russia. Thanks for
> all your help, comrades. We are retiring from NATO as
> well. Bon chance, mes amis.
>
> I have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin
> towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in
> Manhattan with more than two unpaid tickets to sites
> where those vehicles will be stripped, shredded and
> crushed.
>
> I don't care about whatever treaty pertains to this.
> Pay your tickets tomorrow or watch your precious
> Benzes, Beamers, and limos be turned over to some of
> the finest chop shops in the world. I love New York.
>
> A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List
> 2. Since we are going to be seeing a lot more of each
> other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off
> for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox
> and his entire corrupt government really need an
> attitude adjustment. I have a couple of extra tank and
> infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I'm
> gonna put 'em? Yep, border security. So start doing
> something with your oil.
>
> Oh, by the way, the United States is abrogating the
> NAFTA treaty--starting now.
>
> It is time for America to focus on its own welfare and
> its own citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism.
> I answer them by saying darn tootin'.
>
> Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent
> life around the world has only earned us the undying
> enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is
> time to cut taxes here because we will not be spending
> on other peoples problems.
>
> To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks
> guys. We owe you and shall take care of you--
>
> with monetary assistance, tax incentives, tourist
>
> dollars and any other way we can!
>
>
> To the nations on List 2, a final thought. Drop dead.
>
>
> Thank you, good night and....God bless America...
>
>
>
>
>
> Tegwared McAuley(mka Terry Varner)
> Loch Ruadh Archery Marshal
> You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it 
> should, use WD-40.
> If it moves and shouldn't, use the tape
>
>
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