[Loch-Ruadh] (no subject)

[Julie Self]

I agree.  Kind of like 'why do men click a remote so often?'  The answer 
will be given privately, if you want it.

Gwen
Loch Ruadh Rocks!!





>From: "Padraig Ruad O'Maolagain" <padraig_ruad at irishbard.org>
>Reply-To: "Shire of Loch Ruadh, Kingdom of Ansteorra, SCA,Inc." 
><loch-ruadh at ansteorra.org>
>To: "Shire of Loch Ruadh, Kingdom of Ansteorra, SCA,Inc." 
><loch-ruadh at ansteorra.org>
>Subject: Re: [Loch-Ruadh] (no subject)
>Date: Wed, 7 Dec 2005 13:28:54 -0600
>
>Hilarious and true, except for one thing:  all men know the "why" about all 
>these items, we have just never figured out how to explain it to women.  I 
>think it is gender linked - you HAVE to be male to understand it, just as 
>there are things you HAVE to be female to understand.  ;-)
>
>Padraig
>
>Gwenllian wrote:
>>
>>
>>Subject: Men's gifts
>>With the holidays approaching, use these Shopping Rules for Men's  Gifts
>>
>>Rule #1:
>>
>>When in doubt - buy him a cordless drill. It does not  matter if
>>he already has one. I have a friend who owns 17 and he has yet  to
>>complain.  As a man, you can never have too many cordless drills. No  one
>>knows why.
>>
>>Rule #2:
>>
>>If you cannot afford a cordless drill, buy  him anything with the
>>word ratchet or socket in it. Men love saying those two  words.
>>"Hey George, can I borrow your ratchet?" "OK. "By-the-way, are
>>you  through with my 3/8-inch socket yet?" Again, no one  knows
>>why.
>>
>>
>>Rule #3:
>>
>>If you are really, really broke, buy him  anything for his car. A
>>99-cent  ice scraper, a small bottle of deicer  or something to hang from
>>his  rear view mirror. Men love gifts for  their cars. No one knows why.
>>
>>
>>Rule #4:
>>
>>Do not buy men socks. Do not  buy men ties. And never buy men bathrobes.
>>I was told that if God had wanted  men to wear bathrobes, he
>>wouldn't have invented Jockey shorts.
>>
>>
>>Rule  #5:
>>
>>
>>You can buy men new remote controls to replace the ones they  have
>>worn out. If you have a lot of money buy your man a big-screen  TV
>>with the little picture in the corner. Watch him go wild as he
>>flips,  and flips, and flips.
>>
>>
>>Rule #6:
>>
>>Do not buy a man any of those fancy  liqueurs, except Godiva.  If you do, 
>>it will
>>sit in a cupboard for 23 years.
>>
>>
>>Rule  #7:
>>
>>Do not buy any man industrial-sized canisters of after shave  or
>>deodorant. I'm told they do not stink - they are earthy.
>>
>>
>>Rule  #8:
>>
>>Buy men label makers. Almost as good as cordless drills. Within  a
>>couple  of weeks there will be labels absolutely everywhere. Socks. 
>>Shorts.
>>Cups. Saucers. Door. Lock. Sink. You get the idea. No one  knows
>>why.
>>
>>
>>Rule #9:
>>
>>Never buy a man anything that says "some  assembly required" on
>>the  box.  It will ruin his day and he will  always have parts left  over.
>>
>>
>>Rule #10:
>>
>>Good places to shop for  men include Northwest Iron Works, Parr
>>Lumber, Home Depot, Lowes, John Deere,  Valley RV Center, and Les Schwab
>>Tire. (NAPA Auto Parts and Sears' Clearance  Centers are also excellent 
>>men's
>>stores.)  It doesn't matter if he  doesn't know what it is. "From NAPA 
>>Auto,
>>eh?
>>Must be something I need.  Hey isn't this a starter for a '68
>>Ford Fairlane? Wow! Thanks.")
>>
>>
>>Rule  #11:
>>
>>
>>Men enjoy danger. That's why they never cook - but they will  barbecue.
>>Get him a monster barbecue with a 100-pound propane tank.  Tell
>>him the gas line leaks. "Oh the thrill! The challenge! Who  wants
>>a  hamburger?"
>>
>>
>>Rule #12:
>>
>>Tickets to a football, hockey  or basketball game are a smart gift.
>>However, he will not appreciate tickets  to "A Retrospective of
>>19th Century Quilts." Everyone knows why.
>>
>>
>>Rule  #13:
>>
>>Men love chainsaws. Never, ever, buy a man you love a Chainsaw.
>>If  you don't know why - please refer to Rule #8 and what happens
>>when he gets a  label maker.
>>
>>
>>Rule #14:
>>
>>It's hard to beat a really good wheelbarrow or  an aluminum
>>extension ladder. Never buy a real man a step ladder. It must  be
>>an extension ladder. No one knows why.
>>
>>
>>Rule #15:
>>
>>Rope. Men love  rope. It takes us back to our cowboy origins, or
>>at  least the Boy  Scouts. Nothing says love like a hundred feet of 3/8"
>>manila rope. No one  knows why.
>>
>>
>>Julie/Gwen/Mom
>>Loch Ruadh Rocks!!
>
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