[Northkeep] Off topic but funny
Montega Blackdragon
montega_blackdragon at hotmail.com
Fri Jan 23 05:00:56 PST 2004
Subject: New Software
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a
slowdown in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry
applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 un-installed many other valuable programs, such as
Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs
such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. And now, Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and
House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system!
I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but it didn't help.
What can I do?
Signed,
-Desperate
Reply:
Dear Desperate:
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while
Husband 1.0 is an operating system.
Try entering the command C:\I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to
install Guilt 3.0. If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then
automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But
remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5,
Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that creates
SnoringLoudly.Wav files.
Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-Law 1.0 or re-install another
Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash
Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited
memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider
additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally
recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 5.9.
Good Luck!
-Tech Support
Thought this would bring a chuckle or two!
Tega
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