[Sca-cooks] keeping puppies

[Richard Kappler]

Ok, for the record, there is absolutely NO period food content in this
message, and there are more subjects than those listed, maybe I should have
called it Puck's further ruminations.  We still have not reached the point
where Puck is pulling his hair out, though all hell is breaking loose up
here.  I shant go into further detail as someone on this list takes things
written here and delivers them to others not of our list with whispers of
intrigue and deceit where none was actually written about nor intended.  It
strikes me as an effort to curry favor when lack of talent and redeeming
qualities prevent them from otherwise achieving recognition.  They are
known, but won't be validated by being noticed further.

In reading over the last few days mail I notice someone accredited me with
the Adamantius the Grey story.  I wish it was mine, but you'll notice I
didn't sign it.  I sign my work.  That one I 'appropriated' from another
list, modified and sent here.  If I could find out the author, I would have
given credit.  Plagarism, BTW, is very peroid ;-).

I still need flight info for those of you who are joining us at 12th Night.
I need to know what you folk like to drink, too.  No Papa, we can't get
Armadillo squeezins up heah, better bring a bottle or two of yer own.  We do
have these critters we call lobstahs though.  Kinda like a sea armadillo....
with claws.  Big meaty yummy scrummy claws.

Chirart wrote:
>whoo who   I like his wit!  What say list can we keep him?  Ill put papers
>down and misha will feed and water him...    chirhart

A word of warning here Master Chirart, and perhaps an insight into why you
occasionally are exasperated by the wonderous and beauteous Olwen (gotcher
package and yer holiday card Olwen, thangyewveruhmush!  They are loverly!).
As Marion is now learning, one does not paper train a puppy.  The one
exception that comes to mind is the dreaded Shih Ztu.  One goes straight to
housebreaking by teaching the pup to go outside from the start.  To do
otherwise confuses the pup, sometimes leading to never being fully
housebroken (whaddyamean?  It useta be okay for me to take a dump on yer
newspaper!), posting to lists without checking in with your Master first,
autocratting events and all kinds of turrible conditions.

Why, you ask, is Marion now learning about this?  Well, I'm so glad you
asked.  In a long story that I won't tell now, the not so Little Yellow Dog
graduated to Big Yellow Dog status about a week ago by not killing a cat
that deserved to die but rather making a concious decision not to kill it so
her Mistress wouldn't be further upset.  The Big Yellow Dog (original
recipe) and I were quite proud.  So proud we decided to have a drink to
celebrate.  Then we realized, after about the fifth bourbon, that we no
longer officially had a Little Yellow Dog as LYD had finally graduated.  My
eyes brightened, the BYD groaned "NOOoooo!"

I replied, "Yes!"

He quibbled, "She'll kill us!"

"So what?" I countered.

So, Marion got a Yuletide present from Puck and the Two Big Yellow Dogs.
It's a tad bit large.  Okay, it's freakin HUGE.  Scientific calculations,
astrological consultations and bourbon induced derivations lead me to
believe she'll top out at about 140 pounds, fully dressed.  At 9 weeks she's
weighing in just over 25 pounds.  She's a mix of Rotweiler, husky and black
lab, and yes, she does have yellow on her, but is mostly black.

Did I mention that Marion has not killed us yet?  She has named the beast
"Daisy."  Marion loves to hold Daisy in her lap and coo at her.  The BYD's
and I have this vision of a sudden growth spurt that crushes the Center of
My Universe, but she disregards our warnings and puts it in her lap anyway.

It eats the paper Chirart.  It eats everything it can get its maw around.
The cats and the Shih Tzu are getting extremely nervous.  I do not
personally conclude that this is a bad thing, but rather make it as a simple
statement of fact.

regards, Puck