[Sca-cooks] A little diversion

[Christina Nevin]

Are you a food geek?
Take the following test and determine your personal level of culinary
geekdom.
Do you, or Have you ever:

1. Lectured complete strangers on the uses of unfamiliar foodstuffs?
Er, quite often, much to the embarassment of my companions. But hey, I
believe in free education!

2. Know what "rocket" is?
Yummy! that's what.

3. Sneered at the lazy yuppie scum who buy premade polenta at the
supermarket?
Yes, that's half the fun of supermarkets...but have also been known to do it
myself as I sorta fall into that category <hides mobile in fake Gucci bag,
hangs head in shame>

4. Grown your own herbs?
Yes.

5. Grown your own vegetables?
And yes again. My twin thinks I'm sad because if you can't eat it, or it
don't keep bugs away, I won't grow it (sole exception being the palm
potplant on my work desk).

6. Grown your own wheat?
No, you got me there.

7. Foregone buying ice cream because the soup bones have taken over your
freezer?
...and peelings and game and pies for the feast and hey who has some freezer
space to spare?

8. Made your own demi-glace?
Er, they actually sell it?

9. Own five mortars and pestles, but can't find your pepper mill?
Well, I only own four, but I figure that's close enough especially as my
missing only pepper mill is a very pretty blue & white Delft ornamental one
that only comes out for dinner parties. (Sheesh, how did you know that one?
Are we really all that predictable?)

10. Consider your mother a heretic for buying premade pie crusts?
No.
Hey, they had seperate pastry cooks in those days, so I figure this is just
a development on that (and OK, I can't make pastry to save myself)

11. Subscribe to seven cooking magazines but mooch newspapers from your
coworkers?
You say that like it's a bad thing!

12. Stayed up late reading Escoffier, Brillat-Savarin, or Julia Child?
Not Julia Child, but Escoffier especially has given me hours of awe and
bemusement.

13. Say to yourself, "I can cook better than this" at a trendy restaurant?
HELL YEAH!

14. Know the difference between a china cap and a chinoise?
Yep.

15. Fantasize about meeting Charles Ranhofer, James Beard, or Martino da
Como?
Beard yes, and various other Eurocentric chefs.

16. Brag about your 10-inch Dick?
Well, I brag about my Greenman Forge handmade knife all the time, but same
thing really.

17. Know what the last question was about, you vulgar little creature, you?
Heh heh.

18. Have a special carrying case for your knives, sharpening steel,
whetstone, and knife oil?
One of those freebie bags they give you at conventions. Not too swish, but I
refuse to pay the minimum price of L35.00 for something I'd use once or
twice every six months.

19. Spend hours in the "Used Equipment" section of the restaurant supply
store?
Whenever I can but LONDON IS A CULINARY STORE WASTELAND! There's one on
Shaftesbury Ave and the rest are unreachable.

20. Kept a sourdough starter alive for more than two months?
Nope. Can keep a sour mood alive for more than two days, but that's about
it. Sadly not a baking person!

Scores:16
16-20 points.  You are utterly lost.  Hie thee hence to the Culinary
Institute of America before your head explodes.

Well, I prefer to think of it as knowing where I'm going, just not taking
the same route as everyone else <g>.
And who're you calling a geek? ;-)

That was fun!

Ciao
Lucrezia



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