[Sca-cooks] A little diversion

[Craig Jones.]

Drakey here:

> Take the following test and determine your personal level of
culinary
> geekdom.
> Do you, or Have you ever:
>
> 1. Lectured complete strangers on the uses of unfamiliar foodstuffs?

Yup. All the time.  Ad nauseaum.

> 2. Know what "rocket" is?

Yes. It's a salad green.  I personaly really object to it's taste.

> 3. Sneered at the lazy yuppie scum who buy premade polenta at the
> supermarket?

You can't buy premade polenta.  But I sneer at yuppie scum in
supermarkets for fun anyway.

> 4. Grown your own herbs?

Used to grow a heap including Lovage and Dong Quai.  I now only grow
Lemon Thyme and Lemon grass.

> 5. Grown your own vegetables?

I'm never home enough to water them.  They always die.

> 6. Grown your own wheat?

Nope. But I have grown my own mustard seed.

> 7. Foregone buying ice cream because the soup bones have taken over
your
> freezer?

No, but that's because I own an Ice Cream Maker and prefer to fill the
freezer with that.

> 8. Made your own demi-glace?

Once, a long time ago...

> 9. Own five mortars and pestles, but can't find your pepper mill?

4 M&P, one pepper mill but I prefer to use my Japanese ribbed M&P to
grind the pepper instead.

> 10. Consider your mother a heretic for buying premade pie crusts?

Mum. Bake a pie. Mwahhaaaaa.  Mind you, I buy pre made pastry.  Hand
made pastry for 80 pies is a pain.

> 11. Subscribe to seven cooking magazines but mooch newspapers from
your work colleages

I buy Food Ilustrated  and Gourmet Traveller.  Enough Gastro-porn
for one lad, but my work colleages mooch papers off me...

> 12. Stayed up late reading Escoffier, Brillat-Savarin, or Julia
Child?

Lately, It's been Marco Pierre White's White Heat.  I feel naughty
when I read this book...

> 13. Say to yourself, "I can cook better than this" at a trendy
restaurant?

All the time.  I go not to trendy restaurant's but restaurants that
take time to cook and serve food properly.  I get disappointed all the
time but I have a few regular spots in Canberra that never disappoint.

> 14. Know the difference between a china cap and a chinoise?

A china cap is a strainer, a chinoise is a sausage right?

> 15. Fantasize about meeting Charles Ranhofer, James Beard, or
Martino da
No..

No.  But I do fantasize about un-natural acts with a foursome...Me,
Delia Smith, Nigella Lawson, and a 6 liter container of white
chocolate mousse...

> 16. Brag about your 10-inch Dick?

No, but I do have a Nine inch Furi...

> 17. Know what the last question was about, you vulgar little
creature,
you?

Dick?  Short for richard right?  A knife brand perhaps?

> 18. Have a special carrying case for your knives, sharpening steel,

Nope.  But I'm bad when it comes to knives.

> 19. Spend hours in the "Used Equipment" section of the restaurant
supply
> store?

2 words.  Lous Catering.  I once hired a slushy machine for a feast
but that's another story.

> 20. Kept a sourdough starter alive for more than two months?

Nope.  But I'm not a bread maker.

Drakey...uber-cooking-geek...