[Sca-cooks] A Little Diversion

[Pixel, Goddess and Queen]

> Do you, or Have you ever:
>
> 1. Lectured complete strangers on the uses of
> unfamiliar foodstuffs?

Yep. Not so much anymore, but there are fewer clueless college students in
the immediate vicinity.
>
> 2. Know what "rocket" is?
>
Yep. Grandma and I tried to grow it once. Then the nice Italian
grandmother from next door transplanted the extra lettuce into the rocket
bed, before it sprouted. C'est la vie.


> 3. Sneered at the lazy yuppie scum who buy premade
> polenta at the supermarket?
>
I've never seen anybody actually *buy* it at my local supermarket, but
then again as an English-speaking Caucasian I'm in the minority. I would
if I saw somebody buying it, though.

> 4. Grown your own herbs?

Ayup indeedy. And I have refined the art of mooching from people with
larger gardens than I.

> 5.Grown your own vegetables?
>
As often as possible. I wish I had actual land to grow them on.

> 6. Grown your own wheat?

No, but I have grown my own peach trees from pits. One is even still
producing.
>

> 7. Foregone buying ice cream because the soup bones
> have taken over your freezer?
>
There's always room for ice cream. Even amongst the random inedible animal
parts in the chest freezer. If there weren't a chest freezer, then yes.
>
> 8. Made your own demi-glace?

Once. Someday I may again.
>
>
> 9. Own five mortars and pestles, but can't find your
> pepper mill?

Two pestles, three mortars for foodstuffs, one mortar and pestle for
dyestuffs, and three pepper mills, two of which are easily located. The
other is probably in event stuff somewhere. And a spice mill.
>
>
> 10. Consider your mother a heretic for buying
> premade pie crusts?

My mother would consider *me* a heretic for buying pre-made, although we
do buy them for feasts. I learned my pie-crust making skills at her
elbow. My sister, OTOH, is allowed to buy pre-made as she is genetically
incapable of making decent pie crust from scratch. That's ok--I can't do
stuffed cabbage rolls to save my life.
 >
>
> 11. Subscribe to seven cooking magazines but mooch
> newspapers from your coworkers?

Only the one, but I have been known to randomly buy others. Newspapers I
filch off the tables in the employee cafeteria.
>
>
> 12. Stayed up late reading Escoffier, Brillat-Savarin, or Julia Child?

Nope. Scully, yes. Lambeth, yes.
>
>
> 13. Say to yourself, "I can cook better than this"
> at a trendy restaurant?

Frequently. Especially the episode with the soggy creme brulee.
>
>
> 14. Know the difference between a china cap and a
> chinoise?

I almost bought a china cap at a garage sale once. ;-)
>
>
> 15. Fantasize about meeting Charles Ranhofer, James
> Beard, or Martino da Como?

Nope. I'm not one to fantasize about meeting famous people of any
stripe.
>
>
> 16. Brag about your 10-inch Dick?

Not the way you mean, no. ;-)
>
>
> 17. Know what the last question was about, you
> vulgar little creature, you?

Yep.
>
>
> 18. Have a special carrying case for your knives,
> sharpening steel,whetstone, and knife oil?

After a horrid run-in with a housemate, my knives do not leave my
house. If they did, they would have their own case. All my other treasured
tools, be they cake decorating, fiber arts, or C&I, have their own
cases--I see no reason to discriminate against my knives. ;-)
 >
>
> 19. Spend hours in the "Used Equipment" section of
> the restaurant supply store?

*sigh* When I lived in a town where there was one within easy reach. But
definitely keep me out of the kitchen gadget stores.
>
>
> 20. Kept a sourdough starter alive for more than two
> months?
>
Not intentionally, no, but I'm not a bread baker. That's the boy's job.


Hmmm. 15 if you count the point for the peach tree and a couple
contingencies. So I'm not totally lost, but only through a technicality.

Margaret