[Sca-cooks] Five phases for Quiting Smoking

Suey lordhunt at gmail.com
Tue Jul 8 19:15:59 PDT 2008

Euriol sent me this web site:
>>  http://whyquit.com/
My reply more or less is:
I cannot sign up for it cause I did not stop cold turkey.m I was drugged 
to stop smoking, plus the patch and champex, 12  medicines in all till 
my husband Peter took me back to my head doctor and showed her what that 
doctor did to me. I tried hypnoses. The bottom line is that quiting 
depends on you, yourself and I. No one else can do it but it is the 
worst hell you can ever imagine .
One important finding for myself at this website recommended by Euriol 
was an article written by Joel Spitzer saying there are five phases in 
death, loose (something so simple like your keys) and quitting smoking: 
"denial," "anger," "bargaining," "depression," and finally, "acceptance."
I was surprised when I quit that my anger seems to have been minimal in 
my case. My "bargain", if can call it that was to put my carton or so of 
cigarettes leftover in the trunk of my car.  My parking lot is across 
the street from our apartment house. So to fetch one cigarette, I would 
have to call the elevator,  run the risk of having a neighbor seeing me, 
cross the portal greeting the custodians, pass the guardhouse of the 
parking lot and having to greet him. My theory is why comb your hair for 
all that when the urge should be gone by the time you approach the car? 
So I have never done it since I stopped.
    "Depression" that is what I have been going through very badly. All 
these steps are said to pass in ten days so why did it take a year for 
our friends to get back to being normal? Perhaps I am getting better now 
cause I am replying to you and others, reading emails that are weeks old 
and seem to be becoming aware of life around me a little better but I 
notice I am extremely nervous and have isolated myself from all except 
my husband. I had to see a new doctor today as follow up when was 
hospitalized. I always ask Peter, my husband, to come as I am foreign 
and some doctors, thinking I am alone, try to get as much money as they 
can out of us if I go without him. Today hubby had a business luncheon. 
He left it before dessert but called me to tell me to meet him at the 
hospital cause there was a terrible delay at the luncheon.
   The receptionist called my name when my husband was speeding into the 
hospital parking lot. The doctor started asking me things about when I 
was in intensive care and I got so nervous. I could not answer him. I 
have no idea of technical medical terms and I was not very conscious at 
all during that week.
    Doctor turned out to be an old meticulous man obviously not 
interested in money. He thought my blood pressure was going sky high as 
I rattled on at high speed over the results of this exam and another 
while he was trying to take digest every factor and transcribe what he 
could from medical terms from my words and exam results, this way and 
that. I was hysterical cause Peter had not arrived to explain it all!
    Have you ever seen an old man's head rattle? - He was like - 'please 
Lady Suey - cool it, one step at a time as he fumbled from one medical 
exam to another..
    Thank heavens Peter waltzed in at that moment and exclaimed I was 
admitted to intensive care for - I can't even remember the word - Peter 
slipped in smiling giving us the word. Doctor took my blood pressure 
twice, once sitting after lying down for a bit and the sitting and then 
standing. I got flying colors! - I think I was just hysterical waiting 
for Peter to explain it all.
   You talk about group internet therapy for quitting smoking - I tried 
the champex telephone help system thing here in Chile and it turns out 
to be nothing. An old lady answers and says she is going to connect you 
to something but nothing ever happens.
    Anyway I don't think I am ever going to find group therapy. I am not 
interested in people like my dearest Peter telling me I am gorgeously 
fat (100 lbs, I  weighed 80 before now ) that he loves and respects me 
so much because I have been so strong as I have gone through a lot of 
hell in my life and now I am 'Joan of Arc' for giving up smoking (I 
should be recording these sessions to remind him in the future!!! :-* ). 
Nor am I interested in people telling me the healthy aspects of quitting.
   Quitting is hell and I long for help to reach the "acceptance" stage 
but am not there yet. Thank you so much for trying to help and I shall 
keep searching.
    I am very lucky that Peter and my son are ex-smokers - but mind you 
my daughter is a bitch, as a non-smoker she really knows how to hit me 
in my guts.
   Please any clues to help this matter are most gratefully appreciated 
as those which you have sent me.
Thank you for being so caring Euriol and so many of you,

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