[Sca-cooks] P B & J

Susan Lin susanrlin at gmail.com
Mon Aug 24 12:47:34 PDT 2009

We were taught we must have a "no thank you" portion (each time an item was
at the table, not just once).  The rule was the amount must be the size of a
large olive.  I remember my father trying the "I don't want any beets" line
and my sister (still in single digets of age I believe) throwing out the no
thank you portion argument and my father having to swallow an entire fork
full of beets before saying no thank you!

I also remember my nephew and neice screaming bloody murder when my mother
gave them a spoonful of oat bran cereal (instead of prepackaged mushy
oatmeal-yuck!) and them complaining and crying as if she were trying to
poison them.  She didn't make them eat it but I could only think to myself
that if it had been me I would have had to sit there until I ate it even if
it became a "mommy dearest" moment.

I believe in having kids try stuff but not making them eat a whole plate of


On Mon, Aug 24, 2009 at 1:23 PM, Judith Epstein <judith at ipstenu.org> wrote:

> On Aug 24, 2009, at 1:46 PM, David Friedman wrote:
>  feed children like you feed adults, and they will develop a good palate
>>> and an attitude that they can try new things.
>> That was our theory.
>> We ended up with children some of whose standard favorites were 13th
>> century Islamic, but who were still very conservative with regard to
>> anything unfamiliar to them. Our daughter, at 19, is getting more
>> adventurous, but her brother, 16, is still very reluctant to eat at any
>> ethnic restaurant that isn't Chinese, Japanese, Italian, or Persian, and not
>> all that enthusiastic about restaurants in those categories other than the
>> ones he is used to.
> I can't remember my opinion being asked, or my "no, I won't eat that" being
> tolerated. It was, and is, considered extremely rude (at least, where I grew
> up) to refuse to try something, unless it went against your health needs
> (allergies and that) or your religious restrictions. Rude, as in, "the
> eldest son wouldn't try the peas, and he's not allergic, so we won't be
> inviting anyone in that family over again." The theory being that if a child
> said no, it was because his parents hadn't taught him respectful behavior.
> It's probably just as well I don't have children, because I'm sure someone
> would assume I was an abusive mother if I said this while being in charge of
> a child. But when friends come over and someone says "No, thank you" to a
> dish I know they CAN eat, I can't help but think "How rude."
> J
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