[Sca-cooks] food dislikes, cultural mores and being polite. was Re: Re: P B & J

Antonia Calvo ladyadele at paradise.net.nz
Wed Aug 26 15:12:32 PDT 2009

Judith Epstein wrote:
> There are a lot of reasons. Sure, the reasons are valid because 
> they're yours, but if you're good enough friends to be sharing a meal, 
> doesn't your friend deserve to know whether you're objecting to 
> something they might be able to fix, so that you can enjoy one 
> another's company over a nice plate of food? 

No, they don't "deserve" any of that.  They don't "deserve" to be 
treated like a restaurant, or "deserve" to be loaded up with my 
objections to their house, their spouse, or their neighbourhood, and in 
general, they don't "deserve" to be given a list of what they need to do 
before I will deign to visit.  They *do* deserve that I show up, behave 
graciously, don't complain, and do eat my dinner.  It is possible that 
there will be something that I don't eat, but it's really not a big 
deal-- it's a home, not a restaurant, and if there's something I really 
don't like, I say "no, thank you" *and forget it*.

Antonia di Benedetto Calvo

Habeo metrum - musicamque,
hominem meam. Expectat alium quid?
-Georgeus Gershwinus

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