[Ansteorra] Behold! The BODINATOR!
baby_sis_83 at hotmail.com
Sun Jul 22 10:16:44 PDT 2012
*gigglesnort* Agent Pug... Pug needs a fedora! And when he walks around he gets the "doob ba doob ba doo op" theme music.
I've watched entirely too much Phineas and Ferb.
-Gra-- er Chrestien
Sent from my iPhone
On Jul 22, 2012, at 12:08 PM, "Tim McDaniel" <tmcd at panix.com> wrote:
> (If you haven't watched the awesome _Phineas and Ferb_,
> you won't get the running gags. Sorry.)
>> But I don't believe this conversation is helping anyone.
> [jaunty jingle] o/~ Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated o/~
> [fx: crashing sound of a pelican crashing through the wall]
> [fx: dramatic secret-agenty chords]
> [fx: plank cage snapping shut]
> [All dialog is Doofenshmirtz except as indicated]
> Well, Pug the Pelican! How feudal! And by "feudal", I mean "futile".
> I mean really, who comes up with these things? Who can keep them
> straight? I tried a mnemonic, but all I got was "'Feudal' means
> baron, 'futile' means barren", and that's no help at all!
> Anyhooo. You're just in time to see my latest eeevil inator.
> Behold! The BODINATOR!
> When I press this leettle button right here, it will fire a ray at
> Milpitas to make them survey the populace on same-sex crowns. The
> lists will explode with dissention, chaos, and civil war, and in the
> confusion I will swoop in and take over the Entire! Tri! Realm! AREA!
> I'm ... I'm not sure of the final step, just how I'll take over.
> But chaos? Oh, yeah, baby! I'm BRINGIN' it! [Presses button.
> ZAP into the distance. Pause.]
> [laptop on table:] You have mail.
> [The laptop falls off the table in slow motion and explodes in
> mid-air. The network cable burns like a fuze to the router, which
> explodes. Its cable burns fast out of sight.]
> Ha ha ha! [singsong] It's happening!
> [normal] Now I just have to plot my takeover.
> [voiceover] Four days later.
> [Pug, still in the cage, is re-reading _Game of Thrones_]
> I got nothin'. Aaaaand we're done. [sighs. Sad music.]
> For once, you didn't thwart me. My inator worked perfectly.
> I just couldn't close the deal.
> [He presses a button to open the trap] Here, Pug, let me save you the
> trouble. [He presses the Self Destruct button. BOOM. Scorched face,
> hair, and lab coat]
> Tomorrow, I'm taking a "me" day and I'll catch up on my stories.
> Promise. You don't have to come thwart me. You've built up a lot of
> overtime with this, so --
> [Pug looks stricken] What, secret agents are exempt employees?
> At least tell me they give you comp time. [Pug looks down sadly]
> Wow. And they say I'M evil.
> OK. I'll leave the door unlocked. Drop by whenever you want, we'll
> blow up an old inator on the roof, five minutes and you make quota.
> Are we good? ... We're good.
> [voiceover] The next day.
> [Pug and Doofenshmirtz are sitting on a couch watching TV. Between
> them is a bucket of popcorn and a box of tissues.]
> [Juan:] La razon porque te amo ... La razon porque te amo es ... es ...
> Daniel Doofenshmirtz
> Tim McDaniel, tmcd at panix.com
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