Bards - whatever....

Kevinkeary at Kevinkeary at
Tue Jan 9 19:27:50 PST 2001

Well, if it is a challenge...
Don't have anything stirring and patriotic or visionary...
But if something in a slightly LIGHTER vein would be entertaining, even if 
slightly off-color.  I wrote this a while back and haven't performed it 
in-kingdom yet.  Not really period, but quite SCAdian.  No apologies.  They 
wouldn't be adequate anyway.
But I'm sure some of the brewers among the bards will appreciate it.

               An Ode to Yeast

Now let us lift our mugs to Yeast,
Oh, Noble and Noteworthy Beast!
Proof soulless things may be divine--
It turns our grape juice into Wine!
Let praises echo from the eaves
For alcohol is what it leaves.

It fills us 'til we fain would burst
And slakes the driest, fiercest thirst.
This wee, hard worker meets our need.
It turns our honey into Mead!
Oh, see its banner never droops
For alcohol is what it poops.

The gifts of Yeast increase our weal.
They make a feast of any meal
Though bland or strong as teriyaki--
It takes our rice and gives us Saki!
Each earthly pleasure it completes
For alcohol's what it excretes.

Oh, who but Fire could match Yeast's skill
To warm our hearts in winter's  chill
And brings forth light where darkest gloom is.
It turns our horse milk into Kumiss!
(OK, anyone can make one mistake.)
But such worth needs make no excuses
When alcohol's what it produces.

By Yeast is lightened every load
And smoothed the roughest rocky road.
Let its detractors be struck dumb.
It turns our cane and beets to Rum!
Oh, harbinger of heaven's gates
For alcohol it defecates.

Oh, Yeast, too small for mortal sight,
It fills our souls with such delight,
And glory grants with gift so dear--
It turns our barley into Beer!
And joy flows from a thousand taps
For alcohol is what it craps.

So lift your horns and glasses high!
Praise Yeast, who gives us Scotch for rye.
And let no mortal dare to scorn
What trades us Bourbon for our corn,
What dulls our fears, yet hones our wits
For ALCOHOL is what it sh---uhh---emits.

I warned you.
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