ES - If we have to a public place then the event is a failure.

[Noreen And Randy Hartman]

     To all,

    I agree that there needs to be a place for all to be able to meet and 
gather. One of the things we in FIrefall have been trying to do in our own 
small way, is have a place for people to perform, talk, relax and meet in a 
safe and friendly environment. While it is not always possible for us to 
set out our carpet and have an all night party, being human we too 
sometimes must sleep and gather strength for the next days tasks, yet we do 
try and do it as much as possible. Possibly because we all know too well 
what it is like to be new and know how uncomfortable it can be to not have 
a place to feel welcome.
    Many years ago when I first started playing, after I had been separated 
from the household who I had been playing with, I remember being very 
lonely at events and I didn't really feel I was welcome. People were nice 
and polite, but that sense of belonging or of being part of something was 
not there. It only took a few events like that for me to feel that there 
was nothing in the SCA for me any longer.  Maybe thats why since I returned 
and really started playing in the SCA , I try so hard to greet people by 
our fire and make them feel welcome. I may not always succeed in this, but 
I do try very hard at it. For I know it would only have taken a few kind 
words and someone showing an interest in me to have kept me playing.
   Since it is impossible for one household, or even one Barony to extend 
friendship and greetings to all the people who may be visiting from another 
Kingdom or maybe even attending their first event, it falls on each of us 
as individuals to go that extra mile and be friendly to everyone we can. I 
realize how hard that can be for some of us (I get terrorized being in a 
crowd of people and am so self conscious when meeting new people I can 
barely speak), but I try to do the best I can because it is important.
    Being human, I know there are those I have missed greeting when they 
come to our fire, whether it is because I am so over whelmed, or just plain 
tired and scared, matters not. If anyone walked away from our camp and they 
were not made to feel welcome, I have failed in my duty. Not just to the 
SCA, but as a human being. Lets face it, many of us who play are somewhat 
of a misfit in the mundane world. The SCA is a haven for us and a place we 
have gained friendships and a sense of self. I desperately want that joy 
and sense of belonging for others. Having been without that in the past, I 
realize what a truly magnificent thing it is that I now have. I do not 
believe it is wrong of me to wish that for others who ,like I used to, feel 
lonely and unsure of themselves.
    The SCA has been very good to my family and to myself. It has brought 
us much joy and I have gained friends and a place I feel, not only welcome, 
but useful. It is for these reasons that I personally wish to see the SCA 
grow and prosper. Since people are what makes the SCA what it is, it falls 
on us to make sure that those who are interested in it have a good time 
when they come. Not just the first time, but everytime, and are made to 
feel welcome.
    If ever I have failed to make someone feel welcome in our camp, I truly 
apologize. All I can say is that I shall do my best each time and try to 
make all I can feel welcome. With inspirations from people like Sir Galen, 
the Baron and Baroness of Elfsea, Duchess Willow, Darius of the Bells and 
his dear lady, Lord Gurin and his Lady Torgana, Antiginus , Kit, Reanne, 
and my friend David Cade,  as well as so many to numerous to mention here, 
 who have shown me what the SCA is really about, I hope that one day I will 
learn to be as gracious and hospitable as they are.
    I know each camp is a private thing and some people can't always be as 
outgoing as they would like, but if each of us, when we can, attempts to 
emulate those who demonstrate the helpful and welcoming  attitudes, then 
maybe we can make the difference between someone staying with the SCA and 
leaving it.
    There is a saying I came across several years ago, it simply said, 
"Remember, a hug can sometimes save a life" . To me,  it is a reminder that 
a welcoming greeting and a few kind words can sometimes save an SCA 
persona's life as well.

 
                                                                          
Randall

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