[Loch-Ruadh] for the Scots out there...

Jane Sitton lymadelina at yahoo.com
Sun Jun 2 12:00:12 PDT 2002

Thought you would enjoy this, which I snagged from the
joke files at http://www.scotlandonline.com

Enjoy!  --Madelina

Just to be one of us

The average English man in the Home he calls his
castle slips into his national costume a shabby rain
coat ~ patented by chemist Charles Macintosh from
Glasgow Scotland

En route to his office he strides along the English
lane surfaced by John Macadam of Ayr Scotland

He drives an English car fitted with tyres invented by
John Boyd Dunlop of Dreghorn Scotland

At the office he receives the mail bearing adhesive
stamps invented by James Chalmers of Dundee Scotland

During the day he uses the telephone invented by
Alexander Graham Bell born in Edinburgh Scotland At
home in the evening his daughter pedals her Bicycle
invented by Kirkpatrick Macmillan Blacksmith of
Dumfries Scotland

He watches the news on TV an invention of John Logie
Baird of Helensburgh Scotland and hears an item about
the US Navy found by John Paul Jones of Kirkbean

He has now been reminded too much about Scotland and
in depression he picks up the Bible only to find that
the first man mentioned in the good book is a Scot
King James V1 Who Authorised it's translation

Nowhere can an Englishman turn to escape the ingenuity
of the Scot

He could take a drink but the Scot make the best in
the world

He could take a Rifle and end it all but Captain
Patrick Ferguson of Pitfours Scotland invented the
breech loading

If he escaped death he could find Himself on the
operating table injected with penicillin discovered by
Alexander Fleming of Darvel Scotland and given an
anaesthetic discovered by Sir James Young Simpson of
Bathgate Scotland

Out of the anaesthetic he would find no comfort in
learning that he was as safe as the Bank of England
founded by William Paterson of Dumfries Scotland

Perhaps his only remaining hope would be to get a
transfusion of guid Scottish blood that would entitle
him to ask.
Wha's Like US

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