[Sca-cooks] P B & J

Antonia Calvo ladyadele at paradise.net.nz
Wed Aug 26 15:02:31 PDT 2009

Judith Epstein wrote:
> On Aug 26, 2009, at 4:11 PM, Antonia Calvo wrote:
>> Judith Epstein wrote:
>>> But a simple "No, thank you..." Well, it's surface-polite, but it 
>>> doesn't tell me anything that's useful. Give me something I can use. 
>>> "No thank you, I can't eat onions." You don't have to tell me 
>>> whether you're allergic or you just dislike them enough to make the 
>>> dining experience entirely unpleasant. At least, not at the table. 
>>> When I invite you over, that's the time to tell me, "I'd love to 
>>> come, but I should tell you that I can't eat onions." Okay, then, 
>>> that helps me! For that, I will go out of my way to give you an 
>>> amazing meal that doesn't involve onions. Or blueberries, or 
>>> whatever it is that you can't eat for any reason whatsoever.
>> No thank you.  I hate bell peppers with the fire of a thousand suns 
>> and I won't eat them to please anyone, not even you.
> Remind me again, if I invite you to dinner.

The thing is, I'd be cringing with embarrassment if you quizzed me about 
"why" I didn't eat something, and it's wildly unlikely I'd say any such 
thing. I might be willing to have that kind of conversation with my 
close friends, but that's *it*.  If someone grilled me about what I did 
and didn't eat at a meal, I'd be reluctant to dine with that person again.

Antonia di Benedetto Calvo

Habeo metrum - musicamque,
hominem meam. Expectat alium quid?
-Georgeus Gershwinus

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